This is a first.

I am literally blogging from Starbucks.

I feel “cool” and “hip” and some other feelings that I am not used to feeling.

Ask my teenager, I am sure she would not use the above words to describe her “old” mom.

I am sipping a drink I can pronounce, but I have no clue what is in it or how it is made. I do know that it is really good, I like it and I will be ordering it again. I will forget what it’s called, but I know the kind barista will help me figure it out.

For the first time in literally 16+ years, all three of my daughters are in school and I am not at work. I closed the door behind my husband this morning after he left for the day and froze from the silence in the house that seemed to wash over me like a wave. Time at home completely to myself has been elusive at best since I don’t know when.

But did I stay there?

Nope. I headed to the salon for a much needed shampoo, cut, and blow-out. My stylist turned friend relishing in my new found freedom with me, asked me where I was headed next. A quick trip to Walmart for a couple of work related items and then here, to the friendly, neighborhood Starbucks.

If Eliza were still side-kicking it with me, I know we’d still be at Walmart and I would not have begun to  dream of stopping here with her for a drink, much less to stay and to write.

It may be late morning, but this place is still hoping. I am amazed at the number of boxes the delivery guy has spent the last little bit unloading from his semi in the parking lot. He doesn’t seem to be slowing down. I have never considered the needs of stocking a coffee shop. There are others with laptops and headphones, occupied with various activities seemingly undistracted the way I am by all the comings and goings. The background noise includes the canned music interrupted by the clanging and banging of the baristas filling various orders from the counter and the drive through.

When I leave I will head to a favorite, nearby local shop to stroll up and down the aisles perusing thrifts, antiques and boutique-type tops. Later, I will pick up kids from 2 different schools and drop off a couple that aren’t mine with their mommas at predetermined places and times. Homework and dinner will need attention. The familiar chores of laundry and dishes will demand awareness too.

But, for now, I will enjoy the time with my drink, my computer and my thoughts.

My thoughts are filled with gratitude and appreciation.

• My kindergartener loves school and can’t wait to get there. This is a blessing my sister-in-love is praying for.
• My 5th grader felt pretty in her hot pink sundress and recently cut hair as she left for school this morning. the morning of school pictures.
• My heart overflowed as I watched her take her younger sister’s hand and lead her down the sidewalk, up the stairs and into their school together this morning, despite the quarreling that had ensued when they got into the car not 5 minutes before.
• My 11th grader can be trusted and is making responsible, wise decisions in her school, her work and her relationships.
• My job allows me to have this flexibility that I can have this “me” time.
• My drink this morning was paid for through the thoughtful gift card my husband gave me for my birthday. He supports my writing and wants me to do exactly what I am doing this morning.

My thoughts are filled with praise and wonder for God.

• He wrote today down for me in His book before I was ever even born.
• He has brought our family to this place and is working all of this for our good and His glory.
• He is reminding me of His intimate involvement in all the details of this life. From the hummingbirds out my kitchen window to the world political arena and everything in between, He’s got this, sustaining and sovereignly ruling over all of it. Yet, He is meeting me, blessing me and continuing to show me grace.
• He has plans for me and this “new-to-me” life phase. I am already stepping up my involvement at our local pregnancy center and have added the semester’s PTO meetings to my planner. But I know that these hours will be filled with more than just service opportunities. My motives behind my obedience is also being carefully developed as He is sanctifying me through it all, as He is making me more like Jesus.

There was a tinge of guilt this morning when I realized I was happy to be alone, to have this time. But God, has brought me here, brought my little family to this place, this new phase, and, so, I am choosing to rest in the fact that this is how it should be. It’s okay to have some time to be alone with my thoughts and feelings. I am praying that this will be a neat season of spiritual growth where God will do some pretty neat things in and through me…

Finally, my Starbuck surroundings are slowing down a little. There are fewer customers and the drive through flow as slowed. The employees are putting away the delivered boxes. At least one of the other computer guys has thrown out his trash and left.

I am surprised at how well I was able to concentrate. I am not sure this will be a weekly thing, waking on Wednesday to head to Starbucks to write, but I could get used to this.

Photo by KAL VISUALS on Unsplash