Today I am 45 years and 2 weeks old.
A casual observer of my life, might think I am having some mid-life crisis. I ended my 12 year gig as a church weekday preschool director. I have gone back to school, enrolling at Lipscomb University and finding myself taking graduate courses where most of my classmates are half my age. I am starting a new job with new co-workers, new students and whole lotta new responsibilities.
My oldest daughter begins a new life chapter in less than two weeks when we move her to a dorm in a neighboring state. Her absence around our abode will be felt acutely as she is typically a homebody, and as our relationship has deepened, is very much an everyday part of my life. I didn’t plan on her leaving to coincide with all of my other big life changes. Honestly, if I had thought it through, I might have delayed my changes to keep the freight train of change just a little shorter for this calendar year.
Yet, God knew the timing of all of these changes. He knew my age. He knew what was needed when. He reminded me when I took a praxis test yesterday, that He wouldn’t bring into anything He wouldn’t see me through. I am resting and am reassured that all this timing is His and it is perfect. As Hebrews 12 says, I am to run the race marked out for me. In my opinion, the pace these days seems a little fast for my fitness level, but I trust my Trainer because He does all things well.
I don’t know what “normal” looks like anymore. My rockstar husband will be dropping off and picking up our younger daughters at their schools. My class schedule will dictate my Thursday evenings. My alarm clock will go off regularly at an hour earlier than ever before. My responsibilities at my new place of employment are still vague and undefined. I do know that all these things will morph into new routines and my “normal” will be redefined.
As a Christ follower, I can confidently say that to live is Christ. Paul described his life on this side of heaven as fruitful labor in Philippians 1. I am trusting my daughters, my marriage, my ministry at my new job and my future- whatever it may be, however it may look, to Him. He is working all things out and completing the good work He began in me. My life is all about Him and I am trusting, like Paul says in the same passage, that Christ will be honored in me.
These days, these changes are all a part of this “present tense” journey I am on. He is making me more more like Him and using me for His purposes and His glory. My prayer is that the casual observer of my life doesn’t see a mid-life crisis unfolding, but a Christian obediently seeking to follow her Lord’s lead.
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